Down By The River

I didn't really get back to sleep from the last post. After watching God vs Satan on the History channel. I then stuck a dvd on. The History channel seems to have a lot of programmes on about the end of the world at the moment. Is there anybody who hasn't had a stab at predicting when it will be. I really can't understand the obsession the 3 religions of the book have with it.
Anyway it was a beautiful morning so off I went for a walk Three and half hours later I got back home. I got locked into memories of my past. Some sad, many happy. There were quite a few people out walking their dogs down by the river. I remember mine, he is long gone now. We used to have some fun. Same with the horse and the cat and then there are the beautiful memories of my late wife. The anniversary of the date she passed is fast approaching. I miss her so much after all these years more than I can say. She was a fighter and never gave up and for me being part of her life was a wonderful priceless gift that has helped me cope with everything that has been thrown my way.
Where ever you are my love, I'm still trying to give everything my best shot.
xxx

2am

I've just woke up it's just gone 2am feeling very thirsty. Yesterday I walked a few miles,because I really wanted a smoke. It's been about 3 weeks now since I decided to quit again. I fell asleep last night probably just after 7pm. My sleep pattern is all to hell, but I am not coughing my lungs up. I feel good.
I've got a whole clean up now to eradicate any sign that I smoked. What a difference this is making I can't go back now. I'm spending less which means more for when I get out again which unfortunately won't be for 2 months.
2am April 10th 2010 this feels like a real turning point I so really want it to be so I can have one positive memory of the month of April. I feel healthy. Far better than I have for I don't know how long.
I DO NOT WANT TO LOSE THIS.